“Snotmarks”: The Curious Practice of Registering Offensive Trademarks
I discovered the USPTOs little secret a few years back when a customer called to ask how he could register a product name he had thought of. First, I explained, we google it just to make sure that there are no obvious conflicts, then I ask my network of contacts around the world to make sure it doesn’t sound offensive anywhere. After that it goes to the trademark lawyers for a formal search. I asked what name he was thinking of.
For the benefit of non English speakers this is not a nice word and I explained this.
“Are you not allowed to register not nice words as trademarks?
It’s not that you are not allowed to, I explained, but usually you don’t want to.
Later I did check with the trademark database and the first word I typed was “snot”, which returned a surprising 52 entries, including trademark number 3380136 for “Pig Snot®” brand motorcycle wax. There are plenty of others, too, including snot, snot rags, gorilla snot and even snake snot. This page inspired me to coin the generic name of “snotmarks” for all of these trademarks.
Perhaps occasionally someone whose command of English is flawed might register a snotmark by mistake, but it is evident that many people are aware of what they are doing and do it deliberately, In the case of Pig Snot I can imagine that this name will actually resonate with bikers who will see the funny side of it and remember it much better than a blander brand. They will also mention it to their friends. On the other hand a snotmark would not work at all for cosmetics – I can’t imagine any woman buying a skin care product called “cat snot”.
Snot is only the beginning. Searching for ”shit” returns 74 entries, including “Blow Up Shit Safely” brand explosives training , somewhat predictably “Biker Shit” and my favorite: “ShitBeGone” brand toilet paper. Things get even more interesting when you search for “asshole”. There are only 16 entries today but they deserve awards for creativity if not sense. Trademark application 73552389, is for the mark “Fish Assholes”, described in the application as “Circular noodles in tomato sauce” – neither the name nor the dish sound appetizing. Even more bizarre is trademark application 76231954, filed in 2001 for a product in the “Adult toys, adult games, adult devices and novelties” category to be called “We Sell Dick without the Asshole Attached”. They don’t say exactly what it is but you can probably work it out for yourself. The concept is quite clever and will appeal to the men-are-slime demographic but the execution needs more work.
I am not going to list here all the words you can find at the USPTO and its European counterpart, the Community Trademark database, but believe me it is all there, including the stuff that respectable papers wouldn’t print in the old days.
You might be wondering what if anything has not been registered, and this is an important lesson for marketers: every real word or name you can think of has been registered by someone, somewhere, sometime. In fact it is extremely difficult today to find a trademark that is available unless you invent a new word like Kodak or Exxon. Look at the difficulties Apple now has with iPad, already registered in the US alone22 times for products from abrasive pads to medical devices. This is another reason why it is unrealistic to think up one name and expect to be able to use it. When you need to choose a name for a brand or a company it is essential to brainstorm a list of candidate names that are acceptable to you. You need much more than one candidate because your first choice may be registered already by someone else, or maybe it means something unspeakable in Japanese. Or maybe that’s what you want…
This posting is based on the lecture titled “Snotmarks: The Curious Practice of Registering Offensive Trademarks.“ If you’d like to hear the whole lecture contact the author at firstname.lastname@example.org
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